Older People Should Also Respect Children
It is very common to observe how adults tell children that they should respect their elders. This statement, which seems to convey strong and important values, is sometimes challenged by the behavior of the adults themselves. The little ones have to respect, but don’t they also deserve to be respected in the same way?
We tend, wrongly, to treat children as second-class citizens. Due to their young age and life experience, we sometimes overlook their opinions, wishes and feelings. The adult-centered society in which we live does not give enough space or value to the wonderful inner world of our infants.
Rarely do we stop to look at the world from their eyes, to understand their perceptions, to listen to their needs. We feel that they belong to us and we have dominion over them when, in reality, our mission is to guide them in their own personal development. Accompany them and provide them with self-love and security.
Do we lead by example?
We demand that children conform to what we want from them. May they be obedient, listen to us, attend to us and fulfill our mandates. We scold them when they yell, respond, or contradict them. But have we stopped to reflect on our own actions?
How many times have we ignored a child while he was telling us something? How many times have we told you to wait, that we don’t have time now, don’t bother us? In how many situations have we lost our nerves and raised our voices at him, even saying hurtful words? How many times have we answered “no” to their requests, with no explanation other than “because I said so” ?
Why, then, do we demand a respect that we do not offer? Children also deserve to be heard and taken into account. They also deserve to be treated with dignity, with respect, with love and compassion. It is inconceivable to all of us to yell at one of our guests if they spill the drink at a dinner party. However, we do not hesitate to do so when it comes to a child.
It does not occur to us to say to a friend: “shut up for a while, how heavy you are” , while telling us something that matters to him. Instead, we do it with our children. Likewise, what would happen if a child yells at us or tells us to shut up? We would consider it an intolerable disrespect. Why do the rules work only in one direction?
Is it only necessary to respect the elderly?
As we can see, the message behind a “respect the elderly” is unfair and partial. Children resign themselves to being treated tactlessly by adults, but later repeat the pattern. Thus, it is common to see older children neglecting or treating younger children with contempt. It is easy to understand where this behavior comes from. We are sending them the information that the minor must respect the elder, but not vice versa.
The message we really should get across is to treat all people with respect. Therefore, let us also begin to respect children. By doing so, we will be being a great role model for them, who will learn to be understanding and kind to others.
But, in addition, we will be building their self-esteem and teaching them that they are valuable and deserving of respect. In this way, they will understand that this is natural, healthy, and they will not tolerate other people harassing, insulting or humiliating them. Information that reaches such young ages is tremendously powerful. Make sure they get the message loud and clear that they are to be treated with dignity.
We must also respect children
Therefore, let us try to reflect and modify our actions, if necessary. We are all human, nobody is perfect, but it is wise to rectify when we understand that we can do something in a better way. Let’s begin to listen to the little ones when they speak, to attend and show interest in their opinions. Let’s listen to their reasons and reason with them when we give them a negative. Let’s show them that we trust their ability to understand and empathize.
Likewise, let’s talk to them without raising our voices and without harmful words; the message will arrive the same if it is sent with respect. Let us also ensure that the rest of the adults in the environment treat our children in a respectful way. With this, we will be able to educate people who are confident and compassionate towards others.
