How To Act Before The Suspense Of Your Son?
All the work and time that children and youth dedicate to their education is summarized in the report card. Unfortunately, what we find there is not always what we expect from a responsible and dedicated student. We offer you some tips on how to deal with your child’s suspense.
Parents often react in different ways when their child brings bad grades. Some imagine a dire future, as if a bad grade means that he will not succeed at anything for the rest of his life.
Others, on the other hand, feel guilty about this situation. They recriminate themselves for not having collaborated more, not having properly motivated their little one or even not having been more strict.
The reality is that neither extreme is okay. By no means is all lost; Nor does the fact that your child has a school failure makes you a bad parent.
It is, indeed, an uncomfortable situation that must be overcome with the understanding and effort of both parties. Surely he does not like this either, so you should guide him to return to good grades.
How to react to your child’s suspense?
With the above we do not mean that the issue is not important or that nothing should be corrected. Quite the contrary: it is a kind of warning in time on which a lot can be built for the future. So, if you run into a failure from your child, try to follow these recommendations.
1. Stay calm
As much as you feel upset and upset, anger will get you nowhere. With yelling and punishment you will only be able to hurt the child’s self-esteem; Also, the next time you have to face an exam, the pressure and fear of failure will be much greater.
2. Don’t attribute the fault to your personality
A very serious mistake that many parents make is saying phrases like “You are lazy” or “You are not good for studies.” No, this is by no means so.
What should be sought is to promote a change of mentality in the student. It is best to present him with that subject or the school in general as a challenge, a test that he must pass for his own good.
If we hurt their susceptibility with such negative phrases we will only cause discouragement. You can even get to worse instances if it is sustained over time; it is possible to go from resignation or rebellion to true learning disorders.
3. Find solutions
All actors must have a constructive and purposeful attitude. This includes both the student and their parents and teachers. Once the problem has been identified, for which communication between the parties is productive, a strategy can be drawn up to reverse the bad results.
The cause of a bad grade can be very different depending on the case. It may be something circumstantial, such as lack of study time or poor planning; or more serious problems, such as sleep disorders, social or family problems, stress, mental exhaustion, or cognitive disorders.
4. Make self-criticism
This is often particularly difficult for some parents. Although worrying about studies is a task that cannot be delegated to each student, we can ask ourselves how we are collaborating with their education.
First and foremost, what example do we set from our place? Do we fulfill our responsibilities or do we postpone them and try to disengage from them?
Second, is there a permanent communication that allows the boy to express any problem that he may be going through?
Last but not least, are we forcing them to study all the time without attending to their needs? This can cause aversion in them; in fact, the best students tend to have more permissive parents in this regard. Confidence is everything to promote youth self-discipline.
5. Collaboration
Once you have awakened in your child an attitude that allows him to accept his failure and try to redeem himself, it is time to work together. Ask him what he feels is missing, what has happened to him, how you can help him.
Maybe you need a fellow student to make everything more bearable. If not, you may need a tutor or private teacher, who could perfectly be you or your partner.
Your child’s failure is not always due to a lack of commitment or will. You may be doing your best and still have a hard time getting good grades. At that moment is when you should reach out to him so that he can overcome himself. It will be a great life lesson for him.
In conclusion, suspending your child is not the end of the world. Stand by his side and help him face this moment with perseverance and the courage to be victorious.
